MY PRETTY PONY

Hello fair lads and lasses

Sunday we went to the Horse Races for Elissa's Bday which was disproportionately fun compared to all my other Sundays. I'm counting Sunday brunches and laying around doing nothing but laughing and making out til it's dark out again. It was more fun than that, and that's some top shelf fun. Liss was one of my managers at Vice, and she was always my fave. Also, SHE IS RIDICULOUSLY HOT.


Got there early. NO ONE WAS THERE. We started drinking right away. Started off with a nice Laura Palmer (that's what Steven Le calls an Arnold Palmer. He says it's made with nail polish remover). Kat refers to them as TOM ARNOLDS. Heh.

There were Flamingos in the pond. Did you know Flamingo mothers' milk is red? I learned this little tid bit when I was in Japan at Kiddyland from my darling MAMESHIBAS.


Somebody's feeling like a Birthday princess

View from the Winner's Circle

 Look at Rich Royal's cute tie/derby combo. I love a dapper gay.

 The Jockeys were all such teeny tiny miniscule men with incredible might. This was the winner of Race #1 (there were 9 races)

the gnomes of the sports world

a birthday serenade

 He made the corniest jokes, which induced bellowing laughter. I JUST WROTE "BELLOWING LAUGHTER" BECAUSE I AM A 68 YEAR OLD MAN?

This is Artemis. He helped me gamble away all my money on a Daily Double on a horse named SWEET-N-JAZZY.

Can we talk horse names please? I'm doing this while watching Real Housewives of New Jersey (because I don't like any thoughts to pass through my brain after a soothing 13 hr work day), so I can't really go off right now the way I'd like to. I'm waiting for Teresa's bubbies to bitch slap Danielle's "crack whore" face into next Tuesday while Caroline winds up an angry mob fist for a South Jersey beatdown. It's like my friend Johnny says, "watching Real Housewives is like taking a dip in a pool of warm Summer's Eve." Therefore, I will just list my favorite horse names so I can get back to these mob bitches sooner:

TRUFFLE IN PARADISE
PULPIT MAGIC
QUIETLY MINE
DETAILS-R-SKETCHY
ULTRA AWESOME (we won money on this horse)
HI HO YODELER
FIRE IN THE WIND 
SECRET DIVA

Of course we had to bet on GOBBLER'S KNOB. We lost money on him, probably because the poor creature was named after some old-timey man's nethers.



More faves: 
BEETHOVENS ART
KEEPIN IT DEEP
LYDIAS LEGACY
UNBRIDLED ALLURE
BEV'S EX
SIMPLY DAZZLING
JAMAICAN MEMORIES

Horse names or band names?

 rad horse paraphernalia and artwork EVERYWHERE. Like being in every little girl's playtime with their imaginary friend (I was friends with Corrine from Flowers in the Attic)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY